Google's AdSense NonSense

[Sean Nash]

If you are like me, you have probably largely ignored the column of five or so ads here to the right of our network pages. However, I have to come clean; I clicked one today.

Today, an ad appeared to the right of our main page that read:


Decor Grade Coral
Finest Selection, Assorted
Colors, Coral & Shell
Specimens 5" - 30"
GoldStorm.com


"Decor Grade Coral" stuck out like a sore thumb to me. It also made me instantly reflect on whether or not I really am able to ignore these ads, or do I perhaps see these ads subliminally, and am just rarely moved to consciously notice to the point of action? Ick.

So why did "decor grade coral" mobilize me to clickable action? Was it because I absolutely love the simplistic, geometrically-influenced aesthetics of coral skeletons? No. The reason for clicking, once I knew what had hit me, was the simple fact that from my experience in the world of coral specimens, "decor grade" = poached. Yes, poached coral- living coral colonies (or parts of them) which have been broken off below water and brought to the surface to die and adorn the aquariums, coffee tables and desks of so many unaware consumers.

The reality of this is quite simple. Any coral colony you find in a store, on a shelf, desk or display case that is graced with razor sharp edges, is likely a chunk of coral that died an unnatural death. Think about it. When you walk along a beach and find odd pieces of coral that have broken off in storms and found their way onto a beach, you have found coral that has typically been dead for quite some time. Coral skeletons are of a significant weight. This means that all but the smallest pieces -growing in the shallowest of water- will ever find their way onto the dry sediment of a beach without significantly breaking the sharp edges found within the gel-like bodies of the living coral.

If you have ever walked a beach in a tropical or subtropical zone (with reasonable coral growth found offshore) you have no doubt stumbled upon tons of coral fragments. Those of you with this experience also know too well that the vast majority of these coral fragments are broken into bits much smaller than the original coral colony itself. So not only are the sharpest of edges dulled beyond acuity by the constant battering against the sediment, the colonies are actually broken into little bits.

Go back up to examine the website in question. The fact that so many of these coral skeletons are so perfectly sharp-edged and complete should be a big clue that they were taken from the ocean before their time. Some of you may instantly be recalling the coral skeletons you have handled in my classroom during zoology or some other biology class. One thing you must know is that the coral samples in my classroom are either self-collected and quite weather-worn, or are sharp as a box of razors and were donated to the "local biology teacher" at some point. Several of those donation were even done anonymously by leaving a box addressed to me on the counter in our school's main office.

There are spectacular specimens on that site. Hopefully, your "nature loving" desires don't inspire you to make a purchase that may ironically be contributing to the destruction of rare and delicate living things. So- Google's AdSense detects we spend a lot of time talking abut coral, eh? Too bad computer code can't yet read between the lines. Our plethora of posts thus far about "loving" coral will likely end up drumming up business for either helpless critter skeletons or fruity paint colors.

I would implore you to stop looking at the ads- if they weren't the soul reason we were allowed to barge onto this site and play like it was our own backyard.

*Image credit: Muha... on Flickr.

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*Update 12/16/08 => Looking back at this post today, I realized that this was made prior to my realization that Ning was allowing 100% educational sites go ad-free. So today when you read this post- you will not see Google AdSense ads in the right sidebar. Thanks to Steve Hargadon's work with Ning, those ads were removed some time ago.

Sean